Don't Judge Us By How We Wear Our Hair

(My Original Blog Post: http://www.coilyhair.com/dont-judge-us-by-how-we-wear-our-hair/)
February 5, 2009

BY MARY MITCHELL Sun-Times Columnist

Maybe I'm a little touchy right now. But a commentary by Erin Aubry Kaplan about Michelle Obama's hair on Salon.com that was excerpted in the Sun-Times rubbed me.

Last weekend, I had my hair straightened for the first time in 20 years.
» Click to enlarge image
Sun-Times columnist Mary Mitchell

Original article: http://ping.fm/GmUl7

To say the experience was traumatic would be an understatement.

My grandson had never seen me with straight hair. My youngest daughter, who hadn't seen me with straight hair since she was a child, nearly screamed. A close friend almost fainted.

My makeover started out innocently enough. I wanted a precision haircut, and my stylist reasoned that the best way to accomplish that was to straighten my hair so he could see what he was working with.

Afterward, I decided that if I was going to spend a hunk of change for a hairstyle, I darn sure was going to wear it for more than a day.

But every time I look in the mirror, I get a sinking feeling.

In straightening my hair -- a style that I wore off and on for more than 40 years -- I can't shake the feeling I've betrayed the natural sisterhood that I've belonged to for decades.

And, of course, there were the unavoidable comments:

"It makes you look younger."

"It makes you look older."

"It's working for you."

"You look so, so ready for Washington."

When I read Kaplan's article, it stirred up the same tormented feelings I had when I first walked into the newsroom with locks.

"Would even a mild curl on Obama, a la Oprah's lioness look, make people nervous?" Kaplan wondered.

"Hair texture and skin color work in tandem: The darker you are, the harder you have to offset it with "good" hair in order to be considered attractive or acceptable. If she weren't dark-skinned with classic dark features, Obama might not be so wedded to super-straight locks," wrote Kaplan, who described herself as a "black woman with curly hair, but it's not curly enough to be considered kinky."

There's nothing surprising about a black woman -- dark-skinned or light-skinned -- wearing straight hair these days. In fact, black women are probably more versatile than any other group when it comes to their hair.

Throughout their lifetimes, many will have flat-ironed, relaxed, twisted, braided, extended, weaved, wrapped or locked their hair, depending on their mood.

And I've seen as many, if not more, dark-skinned sister in twists, locks, curls and braids, not to mention wigs.

But here's what gets me.

Why are we still looking at black hairstyles as a measure of social acceptability?

Why can't a black woman choose any style she darn well pleases without carrying the weight of "100 years without a comb" and Madame C.J. Walker on her shoulders?

For as long as Michelle Obama has been in the public arena, she has worn her hair in the sleek, straightened style that keeps hairstylists in business.

And I've also seen her with her hair pulled back in a ratty ponytail.

As the first African-American first lady, Obama's personal hairstyle will send some women rushing to salons to duplicate her flowing locks, just as Jacqueline Kennedy's pillbox hats sent the women of her time rushing off to department stores.

Interestingly, former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice's hairstyle also prompted commentary. For a while, writers were obsessed with Rice's old-fashioned 'do.

But I don't recall writers musing that Rice might be reluctant to wear braids or twists because she's a dark-skinned African-American.

And no one cared whether former first ladies Laura Bush or Hillary Clinton had their hair permed, flat-ironed or colored.

Unfortunately, to some people, Michelle Obama's hairstyle is still the "acceptable" style, while my natural twists were too "radical" for respectability.

But I don't think the first lady, who tends to be practical, would have a problem with natural hairstyles if she thought those styles looked good on her.

The days when the way we wear our hair said something about our cultural awareness have long been over.

Still, I'm stressed out. I won't even take a photograph of my temporary straight hair.

For now, it helps to hum India Arie's "I Am Not My Hair."

Original article: http://ping.fm/6l9x8

Stretching Twists

(My Original Blog Post: http://www.coilyhair.com/stretching-twists/)


Ever heard of stretching a relaxer?  That's when someone waits as long as she can before getting another retouch.   Well, I have been doing the same thing with these twists.  I've had these twists for over 2 months--yes, since 2008--and they are still working for me (at least through my own eyes, not sure what you would say :-)). As explained in a previous post, I maintained them by washing and conditioning regularly, and twisting and re-twisting when I'm experiencing lots of new growth... so the twists were still lookin' tight and right.

My last post explained how I salvaged my twists due to a party I was to be attending, knowing I wouldn't have enough time to redo them before the event and all.  I left my twists to soak in a deep conditioning treatment overnight.  By the next day, my twists soaked up as much moisture as they could and were ready to be rinsed... in the morning.  After rinsing, my twists had a lot of weight to them, a lot of curl definition, and felt very moisturized!  My hair had gone to the spa...  and loved it :-)  Now, on to styling.

I had a nail appointment to get to, so I decided to quickly added my leave-in's and moisturizer, rolled random sections of twists onto jerri curl rollers, cover with a scarf, then my knit cap, and out the door I went.  By early evening, I sat under my soft bonnet dryer to complete the drying process, pulled out all the rollers, and I had a head full of curled twists.  Again, being in a hurry, I spritzed some shine all over the twists and left... no separating of the ringlets of curls or anything!  I had no idea what it looked like until I saw pictures from the event.  I was pleased :-)

Spa-Like Hair Treatment

(My Original Blog Post: http://www.coilyhair.com/spa-like-hair-treatment/)
I have really been meaning to change my hairstyle, but these twists just do not want to go.  They really want to remain apart of me!  There has been a few things preventing me lately from getting my hair redone.  The latest reason why I haven't changed my hairstyle is that I was invited to a party two days before hand--the same day I was to take my hair down to have it done on Sunday.  So... I had to choose, and you know I love a great party :-)

I decided to salvage my current hairstyle and therefore did not unravel my twists to comb out to be restyled.  Instead, I put my hair through a serious deep conditioning session since they were very dry and overdue for a deep conditioning treatment (after all, I was planning on my hair stylist to take care of that).  I washed and conditioned my twists very well  and then drenched them in my long-time favorite deep conditioner, Organic Root Stimulator's Replenishing Conditioner.  I covered my twists with a plastic cap, slept in the conditioner, woke up the next morning and wore it to work--yes, to work.  I covered it with a black sleeping cap, and then followed with my knitted black cap.  Since it was a cold winter day and it was a Friday (meaning casual dress), this worked in my favor :-)  Now all I needed to do was let the conditioner work it's magic.